big alta

a little cooked for this one, but no regrets

After fumbling Black Canyon in such an astounding fashion, I sent a quick text to Travis Loncar and DBo at Freetrail to see if there was a spot for me at Big Alta. Actually, this was not my idea originally. However when one begins talking with Travis at an aid station he puts ideas into one’s head and all of a sudden a flight to San Fransisco was booked for a make-up race. I am really thankful they were so kind to let me, a retired, outspoken nobody into the race. Of course I was jazzed to keep running, but a lingering though in the back of my mind wondered if holding onto fitness another month was a good idea.

Boulder has had quite the winter this year. What I mean is, we seem to have skipped it. Guess we will try again next year. During the winter I usually hunker down my training and take some period of off-season. I enjoy snow and ice running, but due to the nature of the conditions, it makes more sense to cut my mileage 10-20%, rest more, and put on a layer of winter fun around my body (I usually gain 5-10 pounds during the winter). This winter I did not do that. It was simply too nice to feel the need to cut things down, and I was training for a race, so it made sense to keep a solid 60-70 miles a week on 5 days of running (two days a week I cross-train). I loved this because I am not a skier, my winter sport is occasional basketball at the rec center, so the opportunity to enjoy miles all winter was great in the build to Black Canyon. I was in pretty good shape (all things considered) on the start line of that race. I do not think I would have been in contention for a podium, but I would have kept it honest from the back of the front back. Well that did not work out, but the itch to race remained, so I prayed for good weather and extended my season.

The funny thing about winter is that even when there is no snow, there are still winter-associated-respiratory illnesses that swarm through secondary schools. A few weeks later, I got the sickness going around the front range from my students, which put a cap on my ability to do any quality work for the last three weeks of training. That’s ok really because speed work really messes with my nerve and at that point I had other things in my life that were more important. Two weeks before the race my mom and sister flew out to watch my defend my master’s thesis. This was a great time and I hardly ran at all during their visit. I also did not sleep much, but felt so emotionally fulfilled during that time, I really did not think about running at all. After defending, I felt so emotionally spent (and satisfied!) I sort of accepted that the race was going to be what it was and it could be a long day out there. The week before the race was my Spring Break from both teaching at the college and at the middle school, and I basically slept and ate and tried to fill my body with enough carbohydrate to feel at least normal at the start. This actually worked really well and I got to the start line feeling ready to run. Though I would have loved to stay with friends at the race, I am really glad this time I had my own hotel by the water. I felt like I needed peace and quiet and water. My extroversion is often my Achilles heel in these situations, because I love people and I am curious about everything. I did do some chatting with the Freetrail team and friends at the 50k race finish, but not so much that I felt overwhelmed.

The thing I enjoy most about retirement (this is a joke, I just love saying that as a 34 year old) is that I do not feel overwhelmed with media/runners/hype anymore. I have a really great filter to keep it out when it does not serve me, and I enjoy being out of any sort of spotlight. I felt like a top 15 finish for me at Big Alta would be exactly correct for my fitness level, fatigue level, and level of interest I want to put into the sport right now. My mind has been elsewhere and running keeps me happy. I cannot state any running-related goals because I am actively finishing a 2-year goal with a master’s degree right now, which is my main focus. Do I want to be fast? Of course! But my cup has a limited amount of energy and resources and right now it has shifted towards other things. Will it swing back? Probably! But when I look in the mirror I see someone who is the happiest she’s ever been and really optimistic for the future. I simply don’t see the need to let some ambiguous expectation about running dimmer my happy disposition.

The race itself is gorgeous. Starting at the Golden Gate bridge had the Full House theme song playing on repeat in my head until sunrise. The views were spectacular, the air moist, the temperature perfect. It felt fun to get out my old Trails Collective singlet and wear that proudly all day. My nutrition went very well. I have embraced the gas station fueling strategy and used Sour Patch Kids, Shaqilicious Gummies, and Rice Krispie Treats as my main fueling source, supplemented by Sprite and chips/pickles at the aid stations. I actually only had one blunder in the last 9 miles where I underestimated how many Krispies I’d need to get to the finish line, and bonked a bit there. But otherwise, my strategy worked well enough. I am thankful I used drop bags because my Gatorade/Skratch mix was much more concentrated with salt than the Neversecond drink mix at aid stations, so getting blasted with NaCl every few hours was really important. I decided to go with drop bags and solo (though a wonderful person offered to crew me!) because I love being self-sufficient and just needed the empowerment from a solo race effort. I don’t think this is faster or slower or a secret strategy, it simply is what I needed for me at that race. It also doesn’t mean I won’t want this help at some other point (I loved having Jon at Javelina!), it just ended up being what I needed that day.

I’d have to say my favorite part was summiting Mt. Tam. I allowed myself to listen to music on the way up (I called this my Tam Jams) and felt like I was dancing my way up a mountain. Zero lows during that section. Would jam on Tam again. The most difficult part for me was when I bonked during the last 9 miles. I really wish I had went with my gut and took extra fuel and water. But I could smell the finish line and so I took off without that extra fuel. I will do better next time.

My feet were a situation for the last 20 miles. I had felt some tendonitis during the week before in the top of my feet so I tried not to tie my shoes super tight. Well this caused my toes to slam into the top of my shoes very often due to the up and down profile of the course. By the end I was struggle-bussing and had almost called a podiatrist as I bonk-walked up a hill at the end. Finally today, 7 days later, my feet feel normal and I can wear shoes that are not Crocs. Yes, I am seeing a podiatrist on Tuesday, not because anything is broken or torn, but because ever since Javelina, my weird feet have been extra weird in the toenail area. Though I do tons of at home treatments, I cannot deny that I need professional help to reset my feet. My mom and sister have had foot surgery, which I will still avoid at all costs, but I think the nails can be fixed less invasively.

What’s next? I will graduate college. I will find a job. I will put on 5-10 pounds.

That is what is next

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